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Frielationships – Cross Gender Friendships

The question beckons, can men and women be truly friendly?I mean platonic, no sexual inhibitions, no couple attraction, no motives? The term platonic is derived from a Greek philosopher named Plato and in all honesty with no offense to all of Greek descendant but the Greeks are not famous for one man/woman woman/man scenarios. With that said the other explanation defines the term as anything theoretical with no intent of leading to physical action. Modern day what can we synonym with the term “physical”;touch, contact, sexual, tangible and concrete. Is it possible to be with the opposite sex without being physical and being platonic meaning no plan to be physical?

We take into relationships of any sort in different ways and may change the rules of the game mid session but the player doesn’t change. The existence of any relationship starts with the game plan, how you play your cards and what is targeted winnings. Keep that thought in mind and ponder on this one, relationships that are naturally formed namely your family and siblings, what do you have to win or gain from them? Let me break it down; you want the warmth, the feeling of being loved, the feeling of having someone to rely and depend on, your confidant. True all those qualities form the basis of any couple relationship, but with the added on extras of physical attraction, physical action, chances of a man and wife life, chances of grandchildren. So if life was maths the equation would be couple = brother or sister + confidant + physical action.

Now in this day and age we define friends as loosely as your mom’s stilettos when you were three or your dad’s hat when you were four. In this day and age we have attached the term friends to physical events hence it blurs the cross gender friendship line, namely FWB(Friends With Benefits) which in essence is a regular one night stand and in honesty ladies of the night get paid for that event, so it would b justifiable to say the lady is your friend for a few minutes thus diminishing the idea of cross gender friendship?

You would be forgiven for getting lost in translation as you hear guys saying my man( closely followed by the new phrase “no homo” to distinguish there’s no mano – a – manna attraction),my homes,my partners some even go as far as calling each other goons. With the ladies, my girls,my girlfriends are very common. Question is what do you call the opposite sex you acquainted with? This is where the idea of romance and the idea of a couple seem inevitable. Anything in this society which is nameless falls prey to preconceived judgement and ideology embedded in us by our forefathers yet we shout at the top of our voices saying we the new generation, we modern, we are the now.

Fact of the matter, depending on your sexual orientation, you will find the opposite sex attractive but as stated before, whats your game plan. I’ve heard many a man say if there’s one line they hate is a female saying “I love you like a brother”. Think carefully about that line, scrutinize it, analyze its foundation and its root, carefully pin point each word, the comparison within. Lets put it in layman’s terms : Brother = Male figure,family, close to you,relation; Love : Affection, warmth, tender; in short or loosely translated : “I have affection for you as my family”.

Men and women can be friends if all intentions laid out, each party going into the frielationship with the thought and purpose its mutual respect, its an extended family bond.

SJ